Sunday Evening Sweep

I know this is the Sunday Evening Sweep, and I’ll get to that in a minute. But first, a story that goes out to the HIT team at Stanton Crenshaw Communications. I went to a nearby mall today (always a terrifying event) to get that pair of sneakers that eluded me on Friday. While waiting in a sneaker store that was playing very crazy music very loudly, I noticed that a few of the salespeople were quite obviously looking at me. I asked for a pair of sneakers to try on – easily the most conservative pair in the house, they weren’t shiny or sparkly or patent leather or camouflage or any such thing. I was looking at the sneaker on my foot, and the salesgirl that helped me looked at me, and looked at the other employees looking at me and said; “You’re just as white as you can be, aren’t you?” (They were all black.)  I looked back at her and deadpanned; “Like a snowflake on a paper plate in a snowstorm.” This promptly brought the house down, and the store manager had to be fetched for a repeat performance. I said it again, and the house came down again. The only other customer in the store, also white, was appalled and said to me, aren’t you offended? I said, ma’am, I am WHITE.  For God’s sake, I have a leash on my sunglasses! What’s to be offended about?

The store manager gave me three free pairs of socks. A very entertaining purchase, all the way around.

OK, here’s the Sweep: 

According to the AP, a mugger tried to rob 56-year-old Margaret Johnson – who, I would point out, was in a wheelchair – and was brought up short when Ms. Johnson calmly pulled out her .357 and SHOT HIM. You see, she was on her way to the shooting range when the fool accosted her. His buddies are so gonna laugh at him for the rest of his life, and rightfully so. He was shot in the elbow, which was kind of her. I’ve have gone for the knee.

Valerie Wilson won a million bucks in 2002, from a NY State scratch-off game. This week, she did it again.  And she still does not plan to quit her job, at least not yet.

The odds of her doing this twice were 1 in 3,669,120,000,000. I need to start hanging out with this woman. I should maybe also start playing scratch-off games. 

This is great: four inmates at a maximum-security prison in El Salvador were found to have cell phones hidden in, ah, body cavities.  Cell phones!  “Hello, hello?  I can’t hear you!  Must be a bad connection! You sound like you’re in a tunnel!”

It gets better…in addition to the cell phones, prison officials also discovered that the inmates had smuggled in chargers…

In the interests of good taste, I’ll sign off here.

Comments

[scribbler]

My rap name is Wonder (as in the bread) & my new album is called "White Melba".
Who's great idea was it to do a SCC blog?
Good call.

[Liz]

That would be ME, BABY! doesn't the site look great? Much cooler than your typical PR agency site.